Fanfic.net wank

[amberdreams]

I have to say this really harshes my melon.  I recently discovered a community of self appointed censors on Fanfic.net when one of their community 'reviewed' a triple drabble written by Edinaclouds, dizzojay and myself.  It's full of innuendo and general sillyness so we rated it a K+.  This so called review said:


Annabelle01 8/6/12 . chapter 1

Hello, Amberdreams.

I was taking a look at your story, and I wanted to tell you that this is rated a little low. You should bump it up to a T in order to meet the guidelines. If you could do this, I'd appreciate it. It would give others a warning that this stuff is a little more suited to T than it is to K plus. Also, if you're unsure in the future about what rating to give your story, it's always best to go a little higher than a little too low.

Annabelle [Member of Critics United]

I had another look at our story and thought about the rating, discussed it with my fellow authors and we concluded a K+ was fine.  I responded to this Annabelle01 saying very politely that we did not agree with her assessment, then did a bit of research about this group, Critics United.

I am really very disturbed and frankly upset about this group and what they are doing.  I can see the value in having people monitoring FF.net for trolls, and for blatant violations of the terms and conditions of posting (such as the rule about no explicit porn) BUT I think this policing should be done by FF.net, not by a few self appointed and self opinionated children, as most of this group appears to be under 18.  And even if the group was populated by a balanced representative group (including all ages, authors and readers, and different nationalities and fandoms), being self appointed, it would be difficult for it to be representative of the wide range of cultures and beliefs that the authors on that site covers. 
Moreover, what this Critics United group say about things is only their opinion NOT law.  Reading their forums, they seem to have either forgotten this fact or worse, never understood that they are not always going to be right in the first place.

There are few things worse than moral bigots wielding power they should not have.

I'm having this (probably not very well expressed) rant now because apparently the fact that is that as I did not agree with their opinion about the rating of our story, this means that they are now banding together to report the story to FF.net to get it taken down.  Without even the courtesy of a discussion with me about the rating - they tell me its wrong and that is enough.  Don't do as you are told or you get hit with the big stick.

I am frustrated, upset and very very angry about this.  I know FF.net haven't taken any action yet, but I do not see what steps are available to me as the person being targeted to protest or appeal, or make a counter-charge against these people.

I could probably go on and on about this and end up making less and less sense so I will shut up now.  And wait and see what happens next.

I'll just republish the triabble here, so you can see what you think about rating it K+ (which in LJ terms I think is somewhere between a G and a PG).  "K+ = Suitable for more mature children, 9 years and older, with minor action violence without serious injury. May contain mild coarse language. Should not contain any adult themes.

Man with the Golden Balls

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E/O WOW: balcony. Our word was athlete in honour of the London 2012 Olympics.

A 3 x100 word triabble by Amberdreams, Dizzo and Edina Clouds (not necessarily in that order).

No spoilers, just nakedness and we don't own anything, not even the Olympics.

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There were several things that were, frankly, concerning about the recently-disturbed spirit of the ancient Greek athlete standing before the bewildered Winchesters right now.

That this muscle-bound Adonis was freakin' huge, like, 'towering-over-Sam' huge with biceps like boulders and jaw like a granite balcony for one.

That he was aiming a badass-looking javelin right at them, for another.

Then there was the toe-curling fact that he was butt-friggin'-naked.

But worst of all, was that this sinuously sculpted monolith, with his glistening, bronzed physique a study in towering strength and magnificent architecture, made both brothers feel just a tiny bit inadequate.

x-x-x

Especially when the ancient athlete made his move, spectral-muscles tightening as he ran towards them, left arm physically outstretched, right arm pulled back ready to release his lethal weapon.

"Now," Dean yelled opening fire on the naked runner – doing his best to ignore the Herculean, bouncing genitals.

It was Bobby's cue. Positioned on the balcony above he began reciting a classical Greek incantation whilst the Winchesters continued firing into the long dead Olympian.

But the salt rounds failed to stop the oncoming titan; failed to stop the release of the javelin which was now heading straight towards the older Winchester.

x-x-x

Bobby's balcony gave him a Royal-Box view of the Winchester Olympics.

First Dean took at least a silver medal in gymnastics floor exercises as he somersaulted out of the path of the sharp pointy object headed his way.

Then Sam proved that he should have been competing in the trap when he fired two perfect rounds in quick succession right into the Greek athlete's temptingly dangling unmentionables.

Fortunately for the ghost, the agony of having his family jewels blown away was short-lived, as Bobby revived the poetry gold medal and finished off the incantation.

"Time for the national anthem, boys."