How to write (or not)

[amberdreams]

Maybe one day, if I keep working at it, I will be able to write porn like this...

or maybe not!
I can't believe a) this is for real and b) it is actually published!!! (And according to the author's website, award-winning???)

Comments

[emmram.livejournal.com]

It presents to us the radical idea that water makes things wet. So great and mindblowing is this concept that it has to be repeated thrice in one sentence!

"dick anuerysm" and "dick parkinson's"... oh dear. Did it also projectile vomit? Or perhaps it behaved more like pus from an incised abscess?

"galloping abs" -- HOKAY. This is a deliberate hoax. An overblown parody. No way could--oh sweet god. Just--wow.

That's actually kind of awesome.

[http://users.livejournal.com/tesserae_/]

Nobody wearing pants like those should have porn written about them.

(And, holy crap, I clicked through to the website to see if the whole Viking thing was some kind of elaborate joke, but it's not! My non-existent Viking ancestors are crying real tears, I can tell you...)

[quickreaver.livejournal.com]

Uhhhh. I'm not quite sure what to make of this! It seems tongue-in-cheek...almost. She HAS to be doing this with a sense of humor! I mean...honestly.

Gotta give her kudos for the marketing, though. What's the saying: any press is good press?